We have a comfortable pattern of nice or twice a week she gives me a great BJ that sometimes ends in a fantastic HJ or pretty good sex. Then other days I will give her a good O orally w/fingers too, then give her a minute to recover and use toys for 1-2 more O’s. We both enjoy the intense attention focused on one of us. Then she goes about once every 3 weeks for some massage fun and I probably go once every 5 weeks. Maybe twice a year we go to a couples thing usually in separate rooms, but recently we did one in the same room which was fun, but she couldn’t finish because so much was going on she couldn’t focus. So it all seems to work out well.