Seeking arrangements is my kryptonite I appreciate yall

[didi88]

I have a similar situation but I initially try to keep all my personal info private until I’m comfortable with the person’s sanity.

I’ve come across a couple SB’s that I feel were attempting to run some kind of extortion game. I immediately shut down all communications once things seemed off and was glad that they didn’t have any real contact info.

I just don’t want the hassle of dealing with that random nutcase who’s got strange motivations. Crazy people can really cause unwanted problems.

Never disclose any personal info to SBs. If you turn off the gravy train for any reason, they could turn on you and some get pretty angry about it. As a married guy, the last thing you want is some pissed off nut case threatening to go to your family or place of business. I use a fake name, backstory, phone#, etc. . No matter how long the relationship might last, I never divulge my real info. A girl who seems ok as long as she’s getting her $$ can suddenly flip out if you want to end it. Personally I think they all have psychological problems, but it may not be obvious at the beginning

 

[InfiniteKpop2]

I find the whole sb/sd game too erratic.
On sdm I get asked for $700 for two hours of hotel fun plus the room fee. Tried it for a bit at. Lower rate from a black cute 19yrs old. Lasted a Few months. But ran its course. The spa works best for me. $220-$280 and were done! No room fee, I don’t have to give my license, I know what I get and I leave. I couldn’t deal with the texts and questions of why I can’t see her twice week, every week. Not for me! But good luck.

Agreed, and once a while you get a free one as a VIP customer.
Text , in , out and be home for dinner ..hahha

 

[Slips1118]

Do you think that’s substantially different from hot women you meet elsewhere, in more “normal” environments? One of the points I’ve always made about why I never had any problem dating strippers — and why I think the only real issues dating a provider would be practical everyday realities and related complications — is that whatever psychological issues they have aren’t typically different in kind (or even in degree) from what you encounter in hot “civilian” women. Four of the craziest serious girlfriends I ever had were (or eventually became) a chemist, a psychiatrist (MD), an attorney, and a pediatrician. IMO, it probably has a lot more to do with everything that comes along with being extremely attractive, especially when that attractiveness was already obvious before they were sexually active adults. And I’m not even specifically referencing early sexual abuse, but just the everyday interpersonal dynamics that typically come along with extreme attractiveness.

Ill take the blame on this for taking us off topic. Youre reading too much into what I wrote. I was just telling people my own experience, shit happens. People deserve to know that bad stuff happens and they shouldn't feel like taking precautions is irrational or an overreaction. Better to be safe instead of having someone clean your bank account, put you on blast on social media, or make your life hell in person. You can still have fun on SA even if you don't use your real phone number.

 

[Zippy17]

I wasn’t disagreeing with you, just suggesting that it might be more about hot girls in general than sex-workers and/or SA amateurs who dabble. I also agree that you obviously need to have a whole different risk matrix if you have a significant other and a traditional monogamous relationship. I just got home from seeing my SA SB...gorgeous really sweet 20 y.o. who costs me $400 plus the hotel for about 8 hours of nonstop sex and really nice conversation that she seems to get a lot out of. Does she have some issues? Definitely, but she knows it, and we talk about them very openly and I feel like I’m a positive person in her life and that our conversations are very helpful to her. As for me, I told her I feel like the luckiest guy on SA that she picked me out of all the guys who have contacted her on there. She says she’s not even seeing anybody else, but, of course, I wouldn’t know if she were, but she knows I’m not the jealous type and that I’d be fine discussing her other relationships anytime. If she is, I’m still just happy to be one of them because she could have just about any guy she wanted. She says I’ve sort of ruined her for other guys because of the way I treat her and the way we talk. The sex is fucking phenomenal, but I think she’s more hooked on the conversations, or on the combination of both.

She’s probably going to keep me in semi-retirement from pros for the time being, because I just can’t justify spending about the same (with upgrades) for 60 minutes and any decent conversation always being at the expense of part of that hour...and also for (her) health reasons. Probably gonna cancel my SA account too, cause I know I’m never gonna do better than her on there, either. It took two years of a lotta bullshit on there with a few fun times in between, but I think it finally paid off. The last time I thought I hit the jackpot on there was last summer, but the girl ruined everything the third time I saw her, and she was $1,000 each time and the only dopey conversation available was about the fucking Housewives of Wherever the Fuck, which was always on her TV, because those obnoxious broads are (literally) role models of success to her. She once described her “checklist” of what she wants to find in a husband who will support her in fabulous luxury and not need her to have a job of her own. I was dying to ask her if she thought the guys who met her criteria had “and was getting CP’d by at least a dozen guys a month before I married her” is on THEIR “checklist.”

 

[이 회장님]

I wasn’t disagreeing with you, just suggesting that it might be more about hot girls in general than sex-workers and/or SA amateurs who dabble. I also agree that you obviously need to have a whole different risk matrix if you have a significant other and a traditional monogamous relationship. I just got home from seeing my SA SB...gorgeous really sweet 20 y.o. who costs me $400 plus the hotel for about 8 hours of nonstop sex and really nice conversation that she seems to get a lot out of. Does she have some issues? Definitely, but she knows it, and we talk about them very openly and I feel like I’m a positive person in her life and that our conversations are very helpful to her. As for me, I told her I feel like the luckiest guy on SA that she picked me out of all the guys who have contacted her on there. She says she’s not even seeing anybody else, but, of course, I wouldn’t know if she were, but she knows I’m not the jealous type and that I’d be fine discussing her other relationships anytime. If she is, I’m still just happy to be one of them because she could have just about any guy she wanted. She says I’ve sort of ruined her for other guys because of the way I treat her and the way we talk. The sex is fucking phenomenal, but I think she’s more hooked on the conversations, or on the combination of both.

She’s probably going to keep me in semi-retirement from pros for the time being, because I just can’t justify spending about the same (with upgrades) for 60 minutes and any decent conversation always being at the expense of part of that hour...and also for (her) health reasons. Probably gonna cancel my SA account too, cause I know I’m never gonna do better than her on there, either. It took two years of a lotta bullshit on there with a few fun times in between, but I think it finally paid off. The last time I thought I hit the jackpot on there was last summer, but the girl ruined everything the third time I saw her, and she was $1,000 each time and the only dopey conversation available was about the fucking Housewives of Wherever the Fuck, which was always on her TV, because those obnoxious broads are (literally) role models of success to her. She once described her “checklist” of what she wants to find in a husband who will support her in fabulous luxury and not need her to have a job of her own. I was dying to ask her if she thought the guys who met her criteria had “and was getting CP’d by at least a dozen guys a month before I married her” is on THEIR “checklist.”

Nice to hear that you found a young gem.

No need for you to cancel your account and if you were to able to find her, then you will find someone as good or even better than her.

 

[sugarmaster]

No wife or kids here either. I've used burners for SA in past. Not always.

I just know that almost every SA chick I got into a long term dealing with had serious issues. These took time to reveal. Most were as bad mentally as any escort or SW I ever met, they were just better hiding it and of course seeming normal.

That's why I ended up switching to burners. I had a few bad experiences and was afraid someone would eventual try to do harm with my real info somhow.

My experience is like Slips. There is a difference between sugar babies and "regular" civilian "crazy" women. It takes a more screwed up person to just meet older men for sex in what is a prostitution-type arrangement. The key distinction here is that most all of these sugar babies are borderline personality. Before you comment, look up the disorder. If you ask them questions, too, you will find that they all have Daddy issues or abuse in their backgrounds.

I learned all this the hard way. I got in deep with one and broke it off and then she called my wife nearly in hysterics. I fucked up big time. I also came across other psychos. One whom I met at a coffee shop, I was using the bathroom when she arrived, and she started texting me all these horrible things thinking I had stood her up. Another one was reluctant to leave the hotel room before me, and when I texted her to confirm she was out, she started texting me very angrily. Indeed, many of them can start off seeming normal, but as is the case with borderlines, the dysfunction is revealed later on. Borderlines are big into revenge. If they think you led them astray or double-crossed them, they will do anything they can to ruin your life.

 

[Dynaguy]

Wow. More than one ex ….

https://www.merakiwellnesshealing.c...line-personality-disorder-what-to-do-about-it


1. Extreme emotional swings

3. Long term feelings of emptiness
Since it is a very undesirable feeling they try to “fill the void” with other things like sex or drugs, while at the end of the day they realize nothing seems to fill it.

4. Explosive anger/rage
hard to control themselves.

5. Fear of being abandoned
Even the thought or suspicion of someone leaving them (like when a spouse arrives late from work) can trigger an upheaval of disturbing emotions. This can cause many of them to “cling for life” to the other person making them seem needy or desperate.

6. Unstable relationships
Falling in love quickly only to be disappointed soon after. Your relationships are either excellent or terrible with no in between.

 

[Slips1118]

I wasn’t disagreeing with you, just suggesting that it might be more about hot girls in general than sex-workers and/or SA amateurs who dabble. I also agree that you obviously need to have a whole different risk matrix if you have a significant other and a traditional monogamous relationship. I just got home from seeing my SA SB...gorgeous really sweet 20 y.o. who costs me $400 plus the hotel for about 8 hours of nonstop sex and really nice conversation that she seems to get a lot out of. Does she have some issues? Definitely, but she knows it, and we talk about them very openly and I feel like I’m a positive person in her life and that our conversations are very helpful to her. As for me, I told her I feel like the luckiest guy on SA that she picked me out of all the guys who have contacted her on there. She says she’s not even seeing anybody else, but, of course, I wouldn’t know if she were, but she knows I’m not the jealous type and that I’d be fine discussing her other relationships anytime. If she is, I’m still just happy to be one of them because she could have just about any guy she wanted. She says I’ve sort of ruined her for other guys because of the way I treat her and the way we talk. The sex is fucking phenomenal, but I think she’s more hooked on the conversations, or on the combination of both.

She’s probably going to keep me in semi-retirement from pros for the time being, because I just can’t justify spending about the same (with upgrades) for 60 minutes and any decent conversation always being at the expense of part of that hour...and also for (her) health reasons. Probably gonna cancel my SA account too, cause I know I’m never gonna do better than her on there, either. It took two years of a lotta bullshit on there with a few fun times in between, but I think it finally paid off. The last time I thought I hit the jackpot on there was last summer, but the girl ruined everything the third time I saw her, and she was $1,000 each time and the only dopey conversation available was about the fucking Housewives of Wherever the Fuck, which was always on her TV, because those obnoxious broads are (literally) role models of success to her. She once described her “checklist” of what she wants to find in a husband who will support her in fabulous luxury and not need her to have a job of her own. I was dying to ask her if she thought the guys who met her criteria had “and was getting CP’d by at least a dozen guys a month before I married her” is on THEIR “checklist.”

They only thing I would say is that I do think SA chicks and anyone participating sw like activities are more likely to have issues than any civi, even the attractive ones.

I understand that your saying you dated very attractive civi women in the past, not associated with SW activity, and they've turned out to be crazy. So the assumption is that it's their attractiveness that is messing them up.

Maybe there is a connection there but ultimately the inclination for risky behaviour is what elevates SA ladies and pros past civis in terms of crazy.

I've met plenty of mentally stable and sensible women of well above average beauty in my life and while I can't say 100% that they never did sw before. It would probably be extremely unlikely, less 1% chance that they did.

 

[sugarmaster]

I would seriously bet borderlines comprise at least 90% of all sex workers and sugar babes. Haha -- I am just remembering one sugar babe who I did not see for a month or two, and when I was doing her in missionary, she had her eyes closed and said, "Don't leave me again, Daddy!" That would be fear of abandonment.

If the woman has a constellation of the following, she is BPD. They have poor impulse control, few real friendships, an eating disorder or history of one, the get real close real fast, they will characterize past romantic partners as if totally bad and evil and that they were victimized by them, whereas most people in LTR realize that each person did things that were right and wrong, they are narcissistic, they are empty inside, they often abuse drugs or alcohol, they often have been physically, emotionally, and/or sexually abused, they often lack a father figure, they do not have an education or career trajectory, they skip from job-to-job and will describe past employers as abusive or unfair. They lie, gaslight and will not acknowledge fault. You are either all good or all bad. Oh, and they engage in sex work. The list goes on.

 

[Slips1118]

I would seriously bet borderlines comprise at least 90% of all sex workers and sugar babes. Haha -- I am just remembering one sugar babe who I did not see for a month or two, and when I was doing her in missionary, she had her eyes closed and said, "Don't leave me again, Daddy!" That would be fear of abandonment.

If the woman has a constellation of the following, she is BPD. They have poor impulse control, few real friendships, an eating disorder or history of one, the get real close real fast, they will characterize past romantic partners as if totally bad and evil and that they were victimized by them, whereas most people in LTR realize that each person did things that were right and wrong, they are narcissistic, they are empty inside, they often abuse drugs or alcohol, they often have been physically, emotionally, and/or sexually abused, they often lack a father figure, they do not have an education or career trajectory, they skip from job-to-job and will describe past employers as abusive or unfair. They lie, gaslight and will not acknowledge fault. You are either all good or all bad. Oh, and they engage in sex work. The list goes on.

I've definitely seen those traits in the women I found on SA. It doesn't help them that they are willingly getting run through by one SD after another. They keep going back for some reason. It just feeds the behaviors your describing. Worse is they never realize it nor do they understand that their putting themselves in harms way. They only think about the pot at the end of rainbow.

The one that nearly ruined me was like that. I called things off and completely got her out of my life.

I did stay in touch with one of close girl friends as that friend was open to an arrangements that suited me and we kept a desitance that I was comfortable with. The friend would later tell me about how the first girl had previously done amateur porn, and had basicly been escorting on IG for a few years, she even got invited to Dubai. This was in the early 2010s before all this became almost normal. There were suspicions that she may have gotten into a "Dubai Porta Potty" situation, google it if you dont know. I was told she was crying for days after her return and she was extra sensitive about everything. She even dropped out of SA and social media for a while but was right back at it about a year later.

 

[Zippy17]

I understand that your saying you dated very attractive civi women in the past, not associated with SW activity, and they've turned out to be crazy. So the assumption is that it's their attractiveness that is messing them up.

Not exactly. I'm not assuming that all very hot girls have issues and/or that it's only the hot girls who have issues. That was just my way of saying that very attractive women often develop certain specific types of self-esteem, self-image, and trust issues that are directly related to being hot, and that the younger they were when they first became objectively pretty, the higher the chance.

 

[didi88]

They only thing I would say is that I do think SA chicks and anyone participating sw like activities are more likely to have issues than any civi, even the attractive ones.

I understand that your saying you dated very attractive civi women in the past, not associated with SW activity, and they've turned out to be crazy. So the assumption is that it's their attractiveness that is messing them up.

Maybe there is a connection there but ultimately the inclination for risky behaviour is what elevates SA ladies and pros past civis in terms of crazy.

I've met plenty of mentally stable and sensible women of well above average beauty in my life and while I can't say 100% that they never did sw before. It would probably be extremely unlikely, less 1% chance that they did.

The obvious difference between SBs and civvies is that SBs are exchanging sex for money, and this puts them into the realm of prostitution. Whether they like it or not, it is what it is, and many are in a state of denial about it. This alone can contribute to mental issues, on top of any they might already have

 

[Slips1118]

Not exactly. I'm not assuming that all very hot girls have issues and/or that it's only the hot girls who have issues. That was just my way of saying that very attractive women often develop certain specific types of self-esteem, self-image, and trust issues that are directly related to being hot, and that the younger they were when they first became objectively pretty, the higher the chance.

Very valid points, if we're just looking at how being attractive comes at a cost. The earlier a girl, especially, is deemed sexually attractive the worse it is for her. I would say yes that is absolutely true from what I've seen. I know plenty of hot chicks from high school that were fucking any college aged guy or older with a little cash and and nice car. Most of those chicks had obvious issues, but most importantly learned to use their appearance as crutch. Rather than solving problems for them selves they got horny guys to do things for them. That became their skill set and left them with an inability to tackle reality in the way others might.

 

[Dwills999]

Never disclose any personal info to SBs. If you turn off the gravy train for any reason, they could turn on you and some get pretty angry about it. As a married guy, the last thing you want is some pissed off nut case threatening to go to your family or place of business. I use a fake name, backstory, phone#, etc. . No matter how long the relationship might last, I never divulge my real info. A girl who seems ok as long as she’s getting her $$ can suddenly flip out if you want to end it. Personally I think they all have psychological problems, but it may not be obvious at the beginning

Couldn't agree more. If you have anyone in your life that you'd consider a SO (married or not) NEVER give your personal info to SBs. NEVER. I had a full-time stalker situation with an ex-SB, who called my SO, my office, emailed my colleagues, and would wait outside my office to follow me at lunch and at end of day, and made my life a living hell for 2.5 years. No matter how much you "think" your SB or situation is different, it is not. NEVER give out the info. There are literally millions of women you can sleep with who don't need that info: fuck them instead.

 

[therealest]

any other guys with wife and kids with an availability only from M-F 10am-5pm? is SA easy for yall?

 

[Slips1118]

Couldn't agree more. If you have anyone in your life that you'd consider a SO (married or not) NEVER give your personal info to SBs. NEVER. I had a full-time stalker situation with an ex-SB, who called my SO, my office, emailed my colleagues, and would wait outside my office to follow me at lunch and at end of day, and made my life a living hell for 2.5 years. No matter how much you "think" your SB or situation is different, it is not. NEVER give out the info. There are literally millions of women you can sleep with who don't need that info: fuck them instead.

Damn, sorry to hear that happened to you.

 

[Whizzard]

I was on SA for about two 2 weeks. In that time I hooked up quickly with one girl who I quickly realized had terrible self esteem/ prior verbal abuse issues and started calling or texting multiple times a day, even though I’d only met up once. Another’s profile said she was 21, quickly moved to texting, then mentioned she was seventeen and I could tell this was going to be an arrest threat scam for money. I bailed as soon as the age was mentioned even though it was probably some dude named Igor in Russia. Then another who immediately said she needed money for a fine and when I called her out, she said “ you rich pricks are all the same”. She was actually mad she couldn’t scam me.
much easier to bang a amp lady or Indy and be on my way.

 

[Slips1118]

I was on SA for about two 2 weeks. In that time I hooked up quickly with one girl who I quickly realized had terrible self esteem/ prior verbal abuse issues and started calling or texting multiple times a day, even though I’d only met up once. Another’s profile said she was 21, quickly moved to texting, then mentioned she was seventeen and I could tell this was going to be an arrest threat scam for money. I bailed as soon as the age was mentioned even though it was probably some dude named Igor in Russia. Then another who immediately said she needed money for a fine and when I called her out, she said “ you rich pricks are all the same”. She was actually mad she couldn’t scam me.
much easier to bang a amp lady or Indy and be on my way.

What I noticed is that in smaller cities it can feel like there is a scammer or someone cat fishing behind every other account. In bigger cities the scammers get drowned out more by the sheer number of women on there but are still there. Plenty of guys with similar stories to your, including my self.

 

[Whizzard]

What I noticed is that in smaller cities it can feel like there is a scammer or someone cat fishing behind every other account. In bigger cities the scammers get drowned out more by the sheer number of women on there but are still there. Plenty of guys with similar stories to your, including my self.

I completely agree. My thought is in big cities you have all the universities and schools with the young hotties looking for easy money. liberal young people who need extra cash gravitate there as well. Where I am, it seemed to be people who can’t hold a job and/ or junkies or low class ladies looking for the easy buck.
anyway, I quickly decided it wasn’t worth it.

 

[didi88]

What I noticed is that in smaller cities it can feel like there is a scammer or someone cat fishing behind every other account. In bigger cities the scammers get drowned out more by the sheer number of women on there but are still there. Plenty of guys with similar stories to your, including my self.

Lots of scammers where I searched in the Asian/Mixed category. After a while, you can recognize the fake profiles, and sometimes they even outnumber the real ones