Well, I'm Chinese. But I've honestly never been attracted to Asian women, particularly Chinese in my youth. I think it has to do with growing up in the culture, and the patriarchy that is our culture really turned me off. I've told some Chinese women when I was in my 20s that I'm looking for meaningful relationships, not a relationship with a chair, that I could step on when needed, and won't tell me no even if it's "go wash the dishes".
I've dated Korean and Japanese women when I was younger, but never a Chinese woman, but they all turned out to be sorta the same. Always out to please the man, take off your shoes when you enter a home, make sure you're fed, etc. I mean I guess alot of men want this, but for me it was a real turn off. My SO and ex were latina and russian.
However, mongering was different. I wasn't looking for a relationship, I guess just a mindless fuck, a fun, get in there, and get out. Now I've developed friendships with some of these providers, but it's not the same. It actually made the sex worse, as now I was literally fucking a friend. It became different. I stopped seeing these girls for sessions and visit them outside of the places for lunch or a movie or something. But as friends. Even their advances outside of their work I turn down. It's just different.
I've come to the conclusion that I became a monger shortly after my divorce, was because I was seeking to fill an emotional void, and sometimes it was hate sex. Not hate sex as in I'd rough up a woman at an AMP, but more so I hated the fact I was divorced, and no longer have that comfort when I go home, or when my wife would visit me in the office and we'd have an awesome lunch just shooting the shit.
Now after a few years of this hobby, I'm back at square one. I am not enjoying it as much. I have been questioning if I even did enjoy it, or if it was just carnal outcry, like a kid who throws a tantrum cause he doesn't have what he wants.
I dunno. I may feel differently later on, but right now, I've just not been into it. I find myself walking around town looking at the couples and feeling either sad or jealous. But right now, I do not want a serious relationship, cause divorcing the person you love really hurts, and at my age, really makes me rethink how I want to do things relationship wise cause of the burn of divorce.
Yeah, I really need a drink.